After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Randomize
