last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Randomize
