he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
Randomize
