My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
