kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
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