There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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