her vagine was all disorganized.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize
