You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
