Is it normal to miss your booty call?
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Randomize
