Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
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