my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
