What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
