super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
I wear drunk well.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Randomize
