47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
