So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
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