1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I FOUND THE LEGS
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
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