Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
he laminated a picture of his dick.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize
