Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Randomize
