It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize