Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
