i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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