At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Randomize