i just wanna soil my oats bro
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
