We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
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