Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
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