I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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