Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
