Im at strip club and am horny
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
