so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
