nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
