it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Randomize
