Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Randomize
