I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize
