oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize