its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
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