It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Randomize
