Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
