remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
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