If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
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