I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
I think I just shit out all my problems.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
