theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Randomize
