Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
Randomize
