this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
