just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
