I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
Randomize
