...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
Randomize
