so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
