Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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