We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
