do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
