he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Liz is crying about burritos again.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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