he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
